dive into mark

Source: Neil Chase’s comment on valleywag.com.

Welcome to the birth of conversational marketing.

We’ve reinvented payola and given it five more syllables.

It’s making people like you and me, who came from the world of traditional newspapers, have to learn about three-way conversations.

Three-way conversation is like three-way sex; it sounds good on paper, but in reality it’s awkward and you never know where to put your elbows.

… So the next step, naturally, is for marketers to want to join the conversation.

This has never happened before in the history of conversation.

It can be done in ethical, responsible ways, and FM’s authors are among the first to figure out how to do it.

I am high as a kite.

In the case of this Microsoft campaign, the marketers asked if our writers would join a discussion around their “people ready” theme. Microsoft is an advertiser on our authors’ sites, but it’s paying them only based on the number of ad impressions delivered.

Advertisers give us money.

There was no payment for joining the conversation and they were not required to do it.

We like money.

They’re not writing about this on their blogs, and of course several of them have been known to be pretty hard on Microsoft at times as reporters. They’re talking about the topic, and readers joined that conversation.

Money money money.

We’re carefully expanding conversational marketing based on all kinds of new ideas that are coming from authors, marketers and our sales reps.

Our advertisers shit all over us, then leave it to us to convince everyone else that shit is the new black.

We’re drafting a set of principles for conversational marketing that will help everyone, inside FM and across the industry, frame the discussion about how we do this the right way.

You too can be covered in the new black.

And we’re taking care at every step of the process to make sure we don’t compromise the editorial integrity of our authors.

Integrity is the old black.

Because our authors are in constant conversation with their readers, they know how their audience feels.

We’re hoping our audience can’t tell payola from Shinola.

If a reader feels an author has crossed a line or betrayed the reader’s trust, that author will hear about it quickly.

You can post a comment in our Can You Hear Me Now?™ section.

Best,
Neil Chase
Vice President
Federated Media Publishing

Brought to you by Carl’s Jr.

(with apologies to John Gruber,
who did it first and did it best)

Disclosure: I work for a company with an advertising distribution network.

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Fifteen comments here (latest comments)

1. The best take I’ve seen so far on this whole sorry episode…

   — Fazal Majid 

2. Aehso’s Output » Getting People Ready (pingback)

3. Well done, sir.

   — Carlos 

4. I liked Ian Betteridge’s coverage of this:
   http://www.technovia.co.uk/?p=1213

   — ManxStef 

5. Does anyone else think the phrase “people ready” evokes an image of a business that, despite being surely *ready* for people, is suffering from a distinct lack of people who are interested in buying whatever they’re selling? I think this is a lot more lame than FM’s previous “human network” shill campaign. At least that time, their message made some sense. This “people ready” bit makes no sense at all to me.

   But unabashed shilling is always fun to laugh at, especially when pimps and hos like Battelle (he plays both roles in this case, I think) end up feeling the need to make futile attempts at defending their “integrity” in public.

   Good times :)

   — Finite 

6. Eek, even Tim Bray chimed in! People-Ready Elephant - Justinsomnia (pingback)
7. סטארטר · תרגום מבולשיטית לאנגלית (pingback)

8. I love the subtle shout outs to idiocracy. Mark clearly has what plants crave.

   — sho'fr 

9. Thanks for the translation. So this is the blog version of “product placement” in movies. As David Lynch’s said: “Bullshit. Total Fucking Bullshit.”

   — Beerzie 

10. Can someone please *please* explain to me what the fuck People-Ready is?

    — ConfusedinCleveland 

11. What is “People-Ready” ?

    Apparently it’s when a business or person in a business realises that they need their customers to be happy, or at least satisfied. It’s a revolution in business thinking, because up until now all these businesses have wanted their customers to have a crap experience with them, and never come back. They probably didn’t even want the customer’s money. Maybe they even have their customers. It’s hard to tell.

    It my seem like a bland, meaningless phrase used by marketing with no substance of any sort whatsoever (like “conversational marketing”) but it’s actually a really useful term. When someone uses it, you know to turn away from them in disgust and never read or buy anything from them ever again. It’s a litmus test for stupid people or marketing bozos.

    — GaryP 

12. Curses! I made a type. “Maybe they even have their customers” should read “Maybe they even *hate* their customers”

    — GaryP 

13. Can someone please *please* explain to me what the fuck People-Ready is?

    Oh the irony.

    — human 

14. Gary P, here’s Michael Arrington’s definition of “people ready”:

    “…we were quoted how we had become “people ready,” whatever that means.”

    Hope that clarifies it for you.

    — lucia 

15. I don’t know how long this parody site will last but its up right now.

    http://www.wipeready.com

    — Dave 

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